this past weekend a young 18 year old girl went hiking and never returned home.
her body was found at the bottom of a mountain face monday afternoon.
she was the cousin and niece and friend of one of my favorite families.
my heart goes out to them and her family in their time of grief.
no one is sure what happened, and we may never know, but her facebook in her last few days cited a breakup with her boyfriend and how she still loved him.
i wonder if i had been with someone that young during her depression, what i could have said to her to make things look better than they were.
do i really have enough experience at a mere 22 to say anything profound?
she loved her boyfriend so much and i can't say that i've been in a relationship like that and then lost it, but i have experienced something maybe more difficult than that, that of unrequited love.
I've found almost everything ever written about love to be true. Shakespeare said "Journeys end in lovers meeting." What an extraordinary thought. Personally, I have not experienced anything remotely close to that, but I am more than willing to believe Shakespeare had. I suppose I think about love more than anyone really should. I am constantly amazed by its sheer power to alter and define our lives. It was Shakespeare who also said "love is blind". Now that is something I know to be true. For some quite inexplicably, love fades; for others love is simply lost. But then of course love can also be found, even if just for the night. And then, there's another kind of love: the cruelest kind. The one that almost kills its victims. Its called unrequited love. Of that I am an expert. Most love stories are about people who fall in love with each other. But what about the rest of us? What about our stories, those of us who fall in love alone? We are the victims of the one sided affair. We are the cursed of the loved ones. We are the unloved ones, the walking wounded. The handicapped without the advantage of a great parking space! Yes, you are looking at one such individual. And I have willingly loved that man for over three miserable years! The absolute worst years of my life! The worst Christmas', the worst Birthday's, New Years Eve's brought in by tears and valium. These years that I have been in love have been the darkest days of my life. All because I've been cursed by being in love with a man who does not and will not love me back. Oh god, just the sight of him! Heart pounding! Throat thickening! Absolutely can't swallow! All the usual symptoms.
{quote from The Holiday}
it hurts to lose someone you love.
he could even be the love of your life.
but how do you go on when you feel like your life has lost all meaning, when there's nothing worth living for anymore?
i would say to this girl, "continue loving him, because loving him, despite the fact that he might not return that love right now, gives you a reason to wake up in the morning, to live your life to the fullest. if you truly love someone you would do anything for them. you know that they would want you to be happy and so you try everything you can to be just that. happy. and even though things may not ever be the same, eventually you can overcome it, you will heal, if not completely, then at least mostly. slowly the pain fades and you remember why you love life. you have friends and family around you that love you unconditionally and that's something to smile about. you will also eventually find someone who will love you for eternity and that's the greatest gift to ever be given. don't lose hope. don't lose sight of what truly matters. give your heart to God. He will heal you. have faith. be believing. everything will work out in the end."
