a little bit stronger

{via i can read}

i'm a girl.
i'm an emotional girl.
i'm a very emotional girl when things get stressful (and sometimes, even when they're not that big of a deal).
twice in the last 2 months i've had complete break downs, the tears come and they don't stop.
every little thing would set me off, i'd feel the tightness in my throat, the welling behind my eyes, and the trembling of my chin.
i got into a dark place, felt alone, deserted, unable to scramble out of the massively deep pit (that was growing ever smaller--that's my claustrophobia for ya) that i had fallen into (because i definitely wouldn't have dug myself into it...that's just silly).
i couldn't figure out (and sometimes still can't) what i needed to do to bring myself back into the light.
food didn't appeal to me, neither did sugar (if you can believe that!). i tried to fill the voids in my life with mundane tasks, watching tv shows and movies when i should've been productive (essentially being a lazy bum). sometimes i would luck out and something would bring a smile to my face, but it was temporary. a mere glimmer of the happiness i once felt.
i started dancing with the U of U's Ballroom Dance Company (and that might've been a slight cause to my breakdown recently, but only because it forced me to spend many more hours at work in a day than i can handle--i've learned my lesson) and as much fun as it was last week, it didn't quite do it for me.
the lack of sleep, lack of time spent at home and my inability to socialize with anyone familiar probably didn't help my mental well-being (or my physical well-being for that matter)
even watching football didn't quite help--it was a temporary release from all the stress.
after breaking down again, i decided that the only thing i could do was run. leave all my worries and stress behind and just run. maybe if i was more of an adventurer, i would have run with no destination, getting myself lost through salt lake. but i'm not, i'm a planner.
though the run was short, i felt better than i had. and though it didn't solve any of my problems, or bring any great insights, i at least was able to feel more than the emotional pain that had been bombarding me for who knows how long.
and watching a gorgeous cloud strewn sunset as i ran/walked home helped to remind me that God is always there (and i'm sure he's sick of my whining/complaining/crying of late)

i don't really know what the point of this was, maybe it's what the title means, that every day i'm going to get a little bit stronger, every day it's going to get a little bit easier. and even when i feel like i'm alone and everyone's forgotten about me, God hasn't. He's proved that time and time again, even if it's just a beautiful sunset (or sunrise, as i'm getting to campus for dance practice).