Day 45

{a letter to yourself a year ago}

Dear self,
I know things seem really bad now. I know you're stressing, and pissed and super upset that _____ is being dumb, and stand-offish (even though you're *supposed* to be best friends). I know you're freaking out about losing _____ as a friend, and you're working real hard to a) have self control and be patient, and b) not freak out to ______ for fear you'll make things worse. your heart is going to break. bad. you'll cry. A LOT. and that's okay. get it out. it's preparing you for future events that would otherwise shake you to the core. you'll be okay. you'll be more than okay. get involved in church activities. meet people (there are really great people out there). have fun. stop trying to "fix" everything. all of these things are happening for a reason. you'll see soon enough. you'll get a trip to utah (two actually!) where you'll see old friends, have a ton of fun and then appreciate all that California has to offer. and then guess what? you'll actually end up moving back to utah, where things again, seem hard, but they get better. you realize after 2 1/2 months part of the reason why you're there. and although there is still drama, you can deal with it better because you've already been there. your heart will heal and you'll find someone better (actually, i'm still waiting for that person...) Heavenly Father loves you. He knows what's best for you. Your family loves you. Your friends love you. They're all there for you. You'll be okay. <3

Love, me