Day 35

{a letter to an ex}

Dear former flame,
This might be harsh, but I don't remember what it was that attracted me to you, is that bad? Maybe that's just me growing up, maturing. But I look back at pictures of us together, and although I know we had fun and had a great time together, I can't remember 1) how I first met you, and 2) what I was so attracted to.
We dated so long ago that I can't remember what it's like to be in a relationship. I know I probably wasn't very good at it, but then again, you probably weren't either. But let's be honest, we were 18. What did we know about relationships? Sometimes I wish things didn't end as badly as they did, but perhaps that's how things had to be, to prepare me for everything that would happen after that in my life in regard to relationships. I can't say I've got it all figured out now, because I don't, but I can say that I learned a lot from that, and from all the other run-ins with guys I've had since then.
I'm grateful (seeing as it is the week of Thanksgiving) for our somewhat messed up relationship, so that I can at least SAY I've been in one, and so that I can learn from that and know what NOT to do. I also know (at least partially) what kind of characteristics I would like to see in my future spouse (or even in just a future relationship).
So thanks for being the first. I'm happy with where you're at now (even if in my opinion, you've downgraded from me. Rude? Sorry.) I'm happy that I can look back and not be sad that things ended the way they did, because I'm where I'm supposed to be now.
I wish you all the best in your life. And perhaps somewhere down the road you and your spouse and me and mine can be friends.

-Me.