perfectly lonely

"nothing to do

no where to be

a simple little kind of free

nothing to do

no one but me

and that's all i need

i'm perfectly lonely

'cause i don't belong to anyone

nobody belongs to me"

-john mayer

last week, vanessa and i were listening to the greatness of john mayer's new album "battle studies" as we drove home from a disappointing beach trip.

I mentioned how much i loved this song.

she said she didn't like it, because who would really want to be "perfectly lonely" and how was that even possible?

i understood where she was coming from, why would you be happy being lonely?

but as i was listening to it again a few days later, it occurred to be that being perfectly lonely meant being content with having no one to come home to because it allowed you to do the things you've always wanted to.

i've slowly realized in the last few months that it's not a bad thing to be single--i am able to go anywhere i want, to do anything i need.

i have very few responsibilities, and no one to report back to. no obligations.

if i wanted to take off for europe for a month, i could.

at the same time though, you're at that point where if someone came along, you'd be open and ready for them, because you've learned how to be on your own and through that, you've grown up.